<Wednesday, January 31, 2007
With my intense masters course and the remaining lack of time I have for leisure, readers might have noticed that I have not blogged in ages!!!! Recently, I have done a film review for one of my units and so I thought it would be a good opportunity to post something I have done on my blog (kill two birds with one stone). Not really sure when I would post something again. I must confess that I do miss writing for leisure, without having to expose myself to criticisms and harsh judgements by lecturers or editors and being able to write anything I fancy and feel comfortable with. I really miss writing about my thoughts, really miss reaching into that small, dark and sometimes unheard part of my heart and listen to it once in a while. I have forgotten how I got my past inspirations from, forgotten about my thoughts and opinions on the mundane yet beautiful things in life.
Anyway, here I shall attach my review on the film 'Blood Diamond.'
Blood Diamond - Review
They say: "Diamonds are a girl's best friend" but in Blood Diamond, a story about the illegal diamond trade in Africa, diamonds are the worst nightmare for most people living in Africa.
Set in Sierra Leone, the film portrays the themes of wealth and greed. The rebels committing atrocious acts and the powerful possess all the wealth while the poor and vulnerable becomes the slaves to their greed. Solomon Vandy (Djimon Hounsou), a fisherman is one of those who have fallen slavery to the greedy. After Vandy's village has been cruelly raided by the rebels, he is separated from his family and forced to work in the diamond fields by the rebels who need the gems to finance their weapons. By chance, Vandy finds a big pink diamond which he manages to bury during a military attack. Both Vandy and the rebels end up in prison. Here, diamond smuggler, Danny Archer (Leonardo DiCaprio) learns of Vandy’s find. With hopes of obtaining the stone, Archer gets him and Vandy out of jail. Archer promised to help Vandy find his family and in return, Vandy will lead him to the diamond. Along with the help of journalist, Maddy Bowen (Jennifer Connelly), the three venture into the darkest and ugliest truths of Africa.
With the releases of The Manchurian Candidate, The Constant Gardener and the recent release of The Last King of Scotland, one might be expecting the usual conspiracies involved and the somewhat complicated and boring plot in Blood Diamond. However, this action-thriller proves to be more than just the cliche storyline. The little-known yet haunting prevalence of conflict diamonds is brought forward through the big screen. The film reflects the nature of the world where wealth, power and greed are the root of all evils. Compassion and loyalty to fellow men no longer have the place to make its presence for the sake of diamonds. The notion of 'Child Labour' has also taken a dramatic and extreme turn when children were trained and brainwashed into child soldiers.
Nonetheless, it is also this ugly but true reflection of the world that evokes powerful emotions and thoughts in the minds of audiences. The heartwarming nature of fatherly love and the steadfast loyalty shown in Vandy only proved to be more potent than ever when audiences make the comparisons between the cruel acts by the black rebels and the nonchalant attitudes of the whites with the selfless love a father and husband have for his family. The right from the wrong is immediately recognised and this realisation made without force or manipulation will leave an unfading mark in many.
As Solomon, Dijimon Hounsou brings intensity into his role. Dicaprio evolves from a pretty boy to someone who is capable of being taken seriously with his impeccable performance. Just like how director Edward Zwick directed The Last Samurai, he has once again trotted down on the same journey in Blood Diamond by making Whites predominantly the hero in a foreign land.
With its intense portrayal of the truth and powerful emotion-evoking techniques, Blood Diamond has proved itself to be a worthy film to watch.
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Here to share something outrageous with all of you. Those with weak hearts or a very traditional mindset should stop reading right now coz I am going to share something rather unconventional so don't say I didn't warn you.
Last saturday night which is the 16th of September, after much hesistation, Marc and I went to a strip club! It was my first time to a strip club but I think it is Marc's third time. For me, I wanted the experience coz I have never been to a strip club before and just wondered what it is like and what the girls actually have to do there. I was rather nervous about going since it is a saturday night and most university students have returned so was expecting the strip club to be rather busy, so I was glad that I had Marc by my side to protect me. Just to make things clear, Marc merely went there for a laugh and to accompany me to a place which I have never ever been to so it was a kind gesture from him and definitely not that he harboured any pervy thoughts, he is not that kind of person. I can vouch for him!
Anyway, we arrived at the strip club around 11pm after attending my friend's party and surpringsly, it wasn't as busy as I thought it would be but as expected, I was the ONLY female customer in there. All others were either old businessmen or uni students. Girls in there were dressed quite provacatively with nothing more than lacy lingerie. We ordered a drink at the bar and then chose seats that had a view in a room where the strippers do lap dancing,the strippers actually do one on ones where one stripper came over to entertain us, I think it wasn't as busy too so they could afford to time to talk to customers.
You would expect the girls working there to be really slutty and bitchy, indeed some of them did act like bitches of the century but the girl who came over to keep us company was one of the loveliest people I have ever met. She was so easy to talk to and made the nervous me feel so at ease. On top of that, she was very pretty too and was a straight As student at college. I know many of you would think --- "How do you start a conversation at a strip club and what can you talk about?" Well, you just talk about anything under the sun with them. For me, I asked a lot of questions about what she was doing, whether she had a boyfriend, how old she was and we did talk about chinese names and about Singapore. Basically, we just talk about anything and I think the scope of the conversation was even wider than talking with people who you get to know from University coz you could ask her a lot of questions about what she is expected to do at her job and for a first timer like me, I had so many queries in mind that needed to be answered and I guess my questions got the conversation going on and on. She was a very patient person and a very very lovely girl and showed no signs of a bitchy stripper. I think I would be good friends with her if we were to meet under different circumstances coz we weren't allowed to exchange numbers (that is the rule of the strip club) and hence there was no way for me to keep in contact with her after.
There was a pole in the center of the room where a girl was doing pole dancing as we went in but I didn't get to watch it much, got a little caught up talking with the girl who came over to entertain us. Of course, Marc wasn't being left out, the both of us were enjoying our lengthy chat with her. After about half an hour or 45 mins later, Marc suggested a lap dance from her, it is only fair as that was the only way she could earn money and it wouldn't be nice for her having to sit with us just chatting. Initially, I i juz wanted to watch while marc gets a lap dance from her but she mentioned that I could go in together while she does one for the both of us but obviously I have to pay too. Since I've already taken the first step in going to a strip club, I really shouldn't stop there so I thought why not?
During the dance, we had to sit with our legs slightly apart with our hands behind us. We are only allowed to watch and not touch during the 3 and a half minutes dance. I was really nervous and had no idea where to look during the dance. Obviously, it wouldn't be polite to look elswhere when she is doing the lap dance and it would be awkward to look at her eyes when she is doing it so I had to make sure that I was giving her my full attention while speaking to Marc every now and again . She was a great dancer and was very fair on the both of us, taking turns equally to 'seduce' us. I think that was also one of the reasons why I liked her, would probably dislike her if she spent more time dancing for Marc instead of me, kinda dodgy if she did that but she was very professional and fair. Stayed at the strip club for another half and hour so, she came and spoke to me for a bit more after the dance and went off to mingle with the others as it was getting busier.
Although, it is kind of strange to go to such places with your boyfriend but I consider it to be a great experience and I was glad that I had this opportunity to do something so unconventional and novel and even happier that I was able to share these moments with my beloved Marc. It is no doubt special to be able to try new things with your partner which could allow the relationship to grow and strengthen as a result. It feels so special that your boyfriend is also like a best friend to you too!
Friday, September 15, 2006
The long awaited graduation ceremony has now come and gone. My graduation ceremony graced its presence on the 13th of September, Wednesday, with an extremely early start for me coz I wanted to get my pictures done before the ceremony. It was indeed a memorable day and it is sad that this day would be the last time all psychology students would come together and for me personally, this day also marks the end of my journey in the field of psychology as I am off to pursue Journalism for my masters. As far as I know, however far I steer away from psychology, it would always remain one of the most memorable things I have ever done in my life. I have always wanted to go into the field of psychology and I really have enjoyed the three years of understanding the human psyche and the enlightening information neuropsychology has provided, so grateful to be given an opportunity to complete a degree in psychology and I know I have not let myself down as I have earned myself an upper second class honours.
Unfortunately, my mum couldn't attend the graduation ceremony but having Marc as one of my guests still managed to make me as blissed and loved as anyone else who attended the ceremony with their parents. At the same time, had another good friend by my side too who is also Marc's good friend, Tom! Kinda feel like a queen having two gentlemen escorting me around the magnificient cathedral and helping me take loads of pictures to capture my special moment for a lifetime. Had lunch after with another one of Marc's friends, Jim, coming over straight after work. I am such a lucky girl, aren't I with the company of three lovely gentlemen who is ever so nice to me! Marc has been such a sweet and fantastic boyfriend ever since I returned from Singapore making me feel loved more than ever and this wee bit of sweetness has managed to make me even more certain about pursuing a future with him.
Nothing much is happening at the moment for me, just waiting to get enrolled into my masters' course which is taking place next friday. I am looking forward to going back to lectures, tutorials and seminars and meeting up with nice course mates (Hopefully!). I really hope that this year would go as smoothly as last and I would be able to excel in this course. I am not going to deny it but it is kind of daunting doing Journalism, it seems so realistic and so close to what I will be working on in future when I carve out my career. Of course, I will be giving in my 100% and hopefully my results would reflect the amount of effort I will be putting in and I will be even more proud of myself in the graduation ceremony next year.
As for now, here are some of the pictures taken on my special day.
Just got dressed up in my graduation gown. Was kinda nervous on that day that I dropped the graduation gown on my way to get dressed.
My gorgeous boyfriend!
Look at the magnificient cathedral
My study buddies
Tom, the lovely friend who took a day off work to attend my ceremony.
Bunny Marc bought me flowers too!! So sweet.
Katie, good friend and best housemate!
Friday, September 08, 2006
Oh myyyy goddddddd!!! (* I am shrieking like Janice off 'Friends') It has been such a longgggg time since I have updated my 'beloved' blog (how ironic!! Since my blog is something beloved to me yet I could abandon this site for almost 3 months now). It is not that I was lazy and forgot every single memory this blog has given me but internet in Singapore was so atrociously bad that there was no way ever I could be online to check my mails or chat on msn, let alone update my blog hence many apologies to those who have been left disappointed each time this site has been visited. (Hopefully, I could still attract my old readers back and also any new readers out there.)
Nothing much has happened over the past few months, I went back to Singapore for the summer with Marc, only he stayed for 2 weeks while I stayed on till the end of August. Although there were odd times of having to miss Marc terribly but at the end of it all, I appreciated this opportunity to be away from him and look at our relationship in a totally new perspective - a clear and unbiased view, which had a surprising result. It has allowed me to see the flaws in the relationship, areas which needed improvements and efforts from the both of us to put in so as to enable our relationship to function even more smoothly, at the same time, I have also seen the strength in the love we have as this seperation has also put the relationship to a test. I have started to build so much faith and trust in Marc, many take it for granted that as long as true love is present, both parties in our relationship should be able to survive moments of seperation. Indeed this is true but at the same time, one should also realised the difficulties present in not having the constant reassurances, the constant physical affection and many other things that could be done in the presence of each other hence, I try hard not to undermine Marc's efforts in staying positive and faithful and the many assurances he had given me in certain not so good times I go through without him around.
The two weeks with Marc around in Singapore was amazing and I am very grateful for him to make such a huge sacrifice in travelling all the way to Singapore giving me a chance to show him the places I used to hang out at, share my many personal experiences and to introduce the people dear to my heart. Two weeks is just too short to be spent in a country so faraway so in future more time has to be dedicated in Singapore. My friends have also been such stars, playing such good hosts to Marc especially Ginette dear!! Thank you for making efforts in allowing Marc try different local delights in Singapore and your neverending enthusiasm and efforts in making sure that he received as much fun as possible. I really appreciate it!! Thanks to all who came on the night before Marc left though it would be helpful for you people to leave early (and not at 2am) for Marc to catch some sleep as he had to get up at 5 in the morning, nevertheless, I had a great time laughing my head off on some of the jokes Frederick made and the unstoppable laugh from the oblivious Gin. Thanks to Yap Jin's car whose alarm went off at 2 in the morning outside my condo while Marc and I were trying to catch some sleep. Those were the moments!!
Had a comforting time catching up with everyone in Singapore from my family to friends. It was really good returning to Singapore after such almost a year. Let me showcase the memories I have in my brain in the form of a collection of everlasting photographs!! (Phil, Yoke, Gin--- Hope u can save the pictures.)
Clubbing on my birthday at MOS
look at that beer!!
Tasty Singapore Sling!
Pinkie up!! Posh...
Wild Wild Wet... we went on a gloomy day to the water theme park! Must be mad?
last night with Marc!
The thorn among the roses or... rose among the thorns?
Marc's favourite pic of me go-karting
Karaoke session.
Monday, June 05, 2006
I always have mixed feelings when it comes to clubbing, I am not really sure whether I enjoy it or not. I think I do enjoy it a great deal only if I were clubbing with people I feel comfortable with and with friends who I know that I could rely on in times of trouble. I am quite picky when it comes to clubbing, I can't go clubbing with just anyone like acquaintances, the theory of not categorising your friends fail to play a part here coz in actual fact, I do categorise my friends, whether consciously or unconsciously.
Personally, I feel rather insecure when it comes to clubbing, it is as if I am more exposed to threats and risks when I go clubbing, I tend to be rather vulnerable when I go to such places resulting in the need of close friends to boost my confidence and make me feel secure. Hence, I would rather forgo the chances of going clubbing if I am not going with people who I feel secure with. I remembered I once went clubbing with only my best friend, Ginette present, it is normally not my style to go clubbing with just one person, I need quite a large group so as to feel secure so I guess this is a good example of proving that Ginette has indeed made it to my category of 'friends who I am dependent on and comfortable with.' (Kudos to you, Ginette, should feel proud!! hehz). I can never imagine having a boyfriend who I feel uncomfortable going clubbing with, one of the criteria of my boyfriend is to be fun-loving and to be up for trying any new enjoyable activities and I am proud to say that Marc is definitely one such person!
When it comes to clubbing, I require a lot of motivation to dance and enjoy my time and of course, only with people who know the real me would I then be able let my hair down and act however I want. I enjoy dancing a lot, it is a good form of exercise where every single part of my body could be utilised and it is only through clubbing where one could act as stupidly as they want to be and not be judged the next day, there would not be a need for one to worry abt their behaviour as long as it has not crossed any limits of being offensive. Personally, I have never come across a night out where I was left unsatisfied, each time I go clubbing, I would go home feeling that I had an amazing night out with my friends.
The last few days I spent a great deal of time chilling in every way possible. I went clubbing on Saturday night with Marc and his friends to celebrate my impending birthday but since I won't be here in UK for my birthday, we decided to have an early celebration for me. Surprisingly, loads of Marc's friends turned up and I was quite pleased about that. Here, I shall present the pictures of that fun night, we went for drinks first at two pubs called 'The Cell' and 'Dogma' and then went over to a night club called 'Ritzy'!!! Ritzy is a very special place to me coz this is the night club where Marc and I first met. Kisses just for him!!!
The two of us look a bit guilty as if we are up to no good.
Ritzy, the place where Marc and I met.
Goofy Jim.
Monkey!
the back of my top is quite unique, like it very much and very appropriate for clubbing.On Sunday, Marc got up early as usual to go golfing while I slept in, I can never manage to get up early after a night out, mere torture to get up early after returning from a late night. So while Marc went golfing, I stayed in with his parents, Marc's brother and his girlfriend. Marc's brother lives in London and he only comes back once in a while. Marc's dad has this really cute volkswagen car called 'bubble car', I went for a ride in it and it is the cutest car ever!! Judge for yourself...
Isn't it cute???
Since it was summer, we had a barbeque in the garden. Summer in England is really pleasant, not too hot and not cold, just right. Golf maniac Marc still wouldn't let golf go after his early morning's game and he started hitting golf balls in his back garden. Too much, don't you think?
Golf freak!!!
To wrap it up, this is one nice picture Marc took at the back of his garden, the beautiful sunset! During summer in UK, the sun sets at around 10pm and rises at about 4am so we get loads of sunlight to make up for all the cold we get in the winter!
Amazing!
Summer in UK is just the best!
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Generally, I think I am quite good in judging a person's character after an exchange of brief conversations with him or her. There are times when I don't really have to exchange conversations with a person personally and could still come up with a conclusion to what the main aspects of their personalities are by observing their behaviour and the way they speak to others. In such instances, instincts and past experiences step in to assist one in making such judgments without having to fully know a person through long periods of times.
I am sure that many of you have definitely said things along this line --- "I just know that he or she will do this or will not do that...." and when probed how and why you came to such a conclusion, many would say ---- "I just know, she seems like that kind of person..." others who are extremely sure about their judgments would even take a step further and say ---- "I can guarantee it...."
I am one such person who relies greatly on my instincts and past experiences in judging a person's character and their future actions. At times, I do not even have to ask favours from a particular person coz I just know that he or she would not provide me with the help I need or they would probably come up with certain excuses to get out of it or by delaying to such an extent that I would get fed up resulting in me doing the job on my own eventually.
It does seem quite unfair to jump to conclusions without giving someone the benefit of doubt coz there is a high chance that my judgment is wrong and they are entirely different to what I expect them to be. But the thing is, I trust myself quite a lot when it comes to my instincts about a person and by including the word 'probably' when explaining the character of a person to someone else, I think I have somehow or rather include the benefits of doubt though I have little faith that he or she would fall out of my expectations.
It may sound contradictory but I must stress that all these judgments which I make merely act as a reference for my own use only, I do not judge a person and shun them because of the things they have done or will do in future, especially if they are my family members and close friends. I think most of the time, people are bound to be judgmental, it allows one to be prepared for what is in store for them when interacting with people and also allow one to behave appropriately. As long as the judgments do not rule the entire 'you', it should be fine to reserve some judgments in yourself.
I can say there are many countless occasions that my judgments about a person is right and due to this, I have gained a lot of confidence in this area and when a person does not match up to my expectations, I would not think that I am wrong, I would merely be surprised that I am not right. I am not a rigid person who can't see past my beliefs but I am cynical and would start to wonder whether the unexpected traits displayed are really their true self or simply just a one-time thing for the sake of impressing someone or for the sake of self-preservation that they stop being nice to everyone so as to prevent themselves from being taken advantage of.
I tend to be quite annoyed when someone doubts my judgments but at the same time, I can't really explain how I could be so sure about certain things, all I could say is ---- "Don't doubt me, I just know, I really just know..." If I am so great in judging a person's character then why do I always fall for idiots who don't treat me right and take me for granted? Here, I would like to say that it is not that my 'judgmental skills' does not play a part, love does not make me blind but love sees more, not less but because it sees more, it is willing to see less and hence I choose to look past the flaws and accept them for who they are by loving them whole-heartedly no matter how I am being treated. Not really healthy but it is just how human beings work isn't it which is why each and everyone of us are able to love and be loved despite of our flaws!
Here again, I just know, I really just know that I would be able to accept the people I love despite of all flaws present and embrace them with all of myself.
As promised, I will include some pictures taken at the wedding party I went to a few weeks ago, didn't take a lot of pictures coz I was dancing my night away. hehe...
Saturday, May 13, 2006
I admit that I tell many many lies in a day, it is not that I have a target in hand and I set out to meet this target by hook or by crook. I think it has just turned into a habit coz it provides an easier and quicker way of getting out of awkward and uncomfortable situations, all I have to do is think of something relevant to say which could both please the listener and at the same time, get me out of any unnecessary impending trouble.
Then again, I must stress that the lies I tell are not exactly damaging which have the ability to hurt others, actually, I consider most of them to be 'small little white lies'. The thing is, I don't think I am very good at telling lies. I could probably get away with lying when it comes to strangers but when it comes to people I am close to, there will be some difficulties involved. I will tend to smile a fair bit or try to look away and even if I am trying my best to stare into their eyes so as to make myself more convincing, I still can't avoid blinking more than usual. Anyway, I don't really tell major lies to the people I care about and even if I do, I would feel guilty after and confess the truth to them (could ask my mummy about that! But then again, most of the time, she'll know when I am telling the truth and when I am lying.).
From my point of view, I just think there is no harm to lying as long as there are no consequences to it. Most people would probably have forgotten what was being said or even left oblivious to the lie told. At times, lying just seems to be the best way to deal with certain dilemmas and by lying, two birds could be killed with one stone, I could get away from trouble without any hassle and at the same time, I don't have to worry about hurting the person by creating a valid reason or explanation to something which I had done.
I apply this principle of killing two birds with one stone when dealing with strangers, especially with very persistent salesmen who are trying to sell some insurance or products to me which I have no interest in at all. And it is at this very moment when I would turn on the lying mechanism in me and lies after lies just come out from my mouth uncontrollably and just a small confession to make... I am actually enjoying every single moment of it! I can transform my whole life into a fictitious one which I have always dreamt about leading and to pretend to be someone who I am not. It is like filming for a movie and my goal is to play a convincing role but only it is even more thrilling in this instance coz no one knows that I am lying and I have to make sure that no one finds out about it too.
I think the fact that I am living in the UK now, I have more information in hand to lie about a lot of things and I tend to do most of my lying when I am in Singapore. When I am approached by some salesman in the streets asking me to buy an insurance, in order not to sound harsh or patronising by walking away and just rejecting their offer without even listening to what they have to say, I would simply come up with a lie that I am not a Singaporean (I am really telling the truth in this case though I could also mention that I am a Singapore permanent resident) and hence, none of their offers or deals on insurance or any financial contracts are relevant to me as I am only in Singapore for a short holiday. I would lie that I am living and studying in the UK permanently and am visiting some friends in Singapore.
Another lie which I came up with is to imply that my parents are divorced and I am born in Hong Kong but was only in Singapore to visit my mum or dad who is living in Singapore. Here, I could gently refuse their offers without having to appear harsh and nasty and at the same time, I am able to gain pleasure and enjoyment out of creating a fantasy life for myself. It is not that I consider my present, real life to be boring, it is just that it is so much more fun by adding colours to a life which i would never experience and yet at the same time, I could embrace this life even it is just for a few minutes by lying to a totally oblivious person. This pleasure could last even longer if the person I am chatting with shows more interest in my life by probing more information. Of course, this would be more difficult with me having to extend my lie and making sure that there are no loop-holes in the things that I said, nevertheless, I still enjoy it a great deal and I am aware that the longest the lie would go on for would probably be about 10 minutes. I am sure I would find little difficulties in coping with this 10 minutes and I merely see it as a challenge.
I am really tempted to encourage others to try lying to salesmen if they ever get the chance to do so but it is really not a very good idea coz at the end of day, this simple act may have the possibility of developing into something more serious probably resulting in one becoming a complusive liar so my advice is this---- only try this if you have a high level of self control!
You would definitely walk away from the salesman with a smile on your face, this short 10 minutes of lying would definitely light up any dull days!
I have come up with a goal and it is to lie less and to tell the truth as much as I can or simply not provide any opinions at all. Of course, there are occasions when white lies would be needed to be told but other than that, I would try to provide my honest opinions to my family and close friends.
Still.... don't expect me to lie if I really find a certain outfit or style ugly, it is better hearing the truth from someone close to you rather than from a stranger and I have no intention in putting the people I care about in that scenario and make a fool out of themselves so if you need any honest opinions on certain things, come to me coz at the end of the day, mostly salesmen are my targets for switching my lying mechanism on!!!
][Have officially finished reading my Honours degree, looking forward to graduating in September and hopefully able to start my new course in Journalism too, I am as free as a bird right now. Going for the wedding evening-do tonight, so excited. Will pose some pictures up once I get the chance.][
Yay!!! No more essays and exams!!
Friday, May 05, 2006
Have finally finished and handed all my essays in but still preparing for an exam (12th of May).... :(
One last thing to do before completing my third year for good. At the moment, I have some spare time in hand but not enough to write an entire post on a certain topic (you know how I tend to go on and on and before anyone knows it, I've spent like 2 or 3 hours on blogging), therefore, this post will revolve around photos hoping that this would appease the readers I have for not blogging for such a long time (many apologies!!).
It was my one and only Marc's birthday on the 1st of May, Monday and so I went out with him and his mates on a sunday night to celebrate his impending birthday. Took my camera with me, unfortunately, I forgot to charge the battery of my digital camera before going and so in the end, only managed to capture a few pictures that night, which was really a waste coz I was hoping to take loads of pictures to add to my photo collection and that night being a special night would have been most appropriate to take loads of pictures and add them to my album of 'happy memories' (though such a photo album has yet to be created). Anyhoo, had a fun time with his friends and of course, with Marc. Never fail to have a good time with him around.
I'm going to a wedding evening-do (I think it's Marc's brother's friend's wedding, so complicated, isn't it but whatever it is, the most important thing is that I am invited) next saturday on the 13th of May so will remember to charge my battery no matter what it takes and hopefully would be able to share those fun times with you people!
For the time being, enjoy the pictures, will blog proper real soon!!!
Birthday Prince with his Princess... Me of course!!
Two funny people to be with.
Tommy!!!
Looking Weird...
Good friend.. Tommy!
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
Just wanted to apologise for the slow updates for the past few weeks. Have been really busy with my essays. Have four essays and an exam and I have four weeks to complete and prepare for them!!! Hence, have little/no time to do anything else but to sit by my desk, face my laptop and type busily away like there's no tomorrow. Even if I have inspirations on what to write for my next post, I have either no motivation or no mood to actually jot my thoughts down so many apologies!!!
However, fret not as I will officially finish my third year on the 12th of May (won't be graduating till september though and hopefully I'll be able to get a presentable honours degree i.e. an upper second class!!! Wouldn't mind a first class degree if possible, hehe.. but to be realistic, an upper second class is already a big treat for me). I will have the time and mood to showcase my inspirations on my blog real soon, be patient ok and I will try my best to reward everyone who is reading my blog with an interesting post!
Meanwhile, take care and do miss me and my writings!!! Wish me luck in completing the ridiculous amount of homework I have got.
I wanna play!!! *sobz* :P
Monday, April 03, 2006
Many people view the world as either black or white. Some people enjoy living and embrace every breath they take with energy and passion while others scream and yell for release and remedy of the 'pain' they are supposedly in. Well.. at least this is what I have gathered from my experiences with the people I am either in direct or indirect contact with.
Through my countless number of times of 'poking my nose into other people's lives and blogs', I came to the conclusion that people merely belong either to one group or the other and blogs are grounds for them to show case which groups they belong to.
(White) -The first group are those who embrace life to the fullest where they are willing to try every single thing life has to offer them. They are cheerful, carefree and look at challenges and obstacles as merely part and parcel of life. Although there are still things in life which will bring them down but they would pick themselves up very quickly and regain the energy and vibe they once had. They have the ability to influence and pass their positive energy to the people around them. They enjoy life to the best of their ability and one can always see them out and about balancing their lives by setting certain time aside for work and of course not forgetting to play with no inhibitions. I think to a certain extent, they are aware that life is short and everyone only has the ability to live once and hence they are ready to take up life as it is being presented.
(Black) -The second group are those who are seem to be constantly in agony and having to live is just a very very painful thing to do. They are always portraying themselves to be suffering from some kind of ordeal and nothing in this world could ever pull them away from the terrible situation they are in. They are always telling people or writing in their blogs about how they want to go missing in action or they just simply want to die!!
From my tone, you would have sense my cynicism to the second group of people. Yes.. indeed I am cynical. To me, many of them just want attention from other people, I am not denying the fact that there may be many people who are REALLY suffering from depression and they merely just want to let it out into the open through their blogs. Being a person who has gone through this before, I should be very aware that there are people like these around. I once frequently made use of my blog to cry out for help, hoping that the only person who could 'save me' would read what I have written and come to my salvation. I was truly upset then and my blog was the only healthy outlet I had at that time. However, just because I used to be one of the people belonging in the second category does not mean that I condone their actions, neither does it mean that every single one of them has my sympathy and understanding.
There are quite a number of reasons to why I have turned into a cynic to the second group. I just could not bear the fact that after they have talked or written so many horrible things that they are going through presently, they are still able to take loads of pictures and smile and enjoy their lives like the things they have written does not even exist at all. I am glad that they ARE enjoying their lives and making efforts to try out different things in life but I don't see how being as depressed and as hopeless they have made themselves out to be, they are still able to carry out these actions, because I know that being truly upset and truly dejected, a person could NEVER do such things. At the same time, why are they CONSTANTLY suffering, surely they would do every single thing possible to make themselves feel better and would want to come out of the 'darkness' as soon as they can. Even though they can't do it, they would still make an effort.
I am annoyed with them not because they are truly suffering, I just can't tolerate the fact that all that they are doing is to maintain an IMAGE. An image that they want to portray to the world and thus able to gain some kind of attention which they yearn for. Yet, they keep leaking out loop-holes causing people to think that they have the potential of actually lying just so that they could manipulate the people around them by making others worry and go to them whenever they want or need them to. I don't mind them enjoying their lives just don't lie about the state you are in. I find it so revolting and so attention-seeking!!! That is what truly annoys me. I would gladly provide the support and help if they really needed it and at times, you JUST KNOW that certain people are merely behaving in a way for attention and sympathy.
After 2 wasted years being truly depressed, I have no intention whatsoever to go back to the life I led back then, I just feel I have lost 2 valuable years of my short life being shut away from the beautiful things in the world, losing out on all the fun that I could have back then. I now want to join the first group of people where the world is 'white' to them. Of course, I do see the significance of those horrible times which I have gone through, without these times, I would fail to possess the ability to appreciate the beauty of life, I would fail to see life as short and I owe it to myself that I should enjoy my life to the fullest by trying out all potential things in life and having fun out of it. Without hardships, how could one ever appreciate the good times? I just don't wish to see other people portray a fake image of who they truly are just so they could attract attention by making the people who truly care and love them worry unnecessarily.
Maybe a 'grey' world would settle for everyone then instead of just 'Black or White' then there would not be able deceits and everyone would lead a comfortable life.
" Dream like you live forever, live like you die tomorrow!"
Monday, March 20, 2006
Here is an update on the mini holiday which I have just been to, a mini-cruise to Holland!!! It was really just a weekend getaway for my boyfriend and I, it is our 6 months anniversary on the 26th of March and since he paid for the trip to Berlin for our 3 months anniversary, I thought it would be nice and kind of me to get him a mini-cruise to Holland as my 6 months anniversary gift to him. The ferry was called "Pride of Hull" and we set of at Hull which is about 45 minutes away from Lincoln (where I am at the moment!), I got the chance to see the Humber bridge too which looked like the bridge in Hong Kong, really grand! (can't remember what the name was, hehe, I know the Chinese name though, I think it is called the "Green Horse bridge" or something, isn't it?)
I must say that I have enjoyed the trip tremendously probably coz this is my first time on a cruise and to Holland. Everything just seemed so perfect with me going to a foreign land, enjoying the facilities on the cruise and most importantly, spending all of these magical moments with the person I adore and love with all my heart.
I really enjoyed the time spent on the ferry, there were so many facilities on-board with the bars being the highlights, there were about three different bars on the ferry and it was so very crowded on the first night, there were two cinemas and different shops for buying souvenirs, fags, wines and beers. You would think that it must be boring being stuck in a large confined space having limited amount of things to do but may I propose my humble opinion--- it was not at all boring!! All you want to do then was to explore every part of the ship to the best of your ability and to go to different bars for drinks and chill. Personally, I really love the idea of staying on the ship where it is warm yet still able to enjoy going shopping and visiting different bars! It was definitely a one of a kind experience!
Arrived in Rotterdam and got a coach transfer to Amsterdam. People in Amsterdam were really friendly and fashionable. Men there are really good looking as well, some of them actually made me stop in my tracks and look at them (just exaggerating, but they are really good looking), sad to say, many of them are also gay. This is the first time in my entire life that I have seen so many gays and lesbians around but they are rather sweet together, going shopping and asking each other about whether certain tops are nice on them and stuff like that.
Initially, we wanted to go to two museums but due to the constraints in time, we just ended up shopping which I was totally cool with (Did go into a sex shop if that could be considered as a museum)!! Suprisingly though, I didn't buy many clothes so being a filial daughter and a family-oriented girl (hehe..), I spent most of my money on souvneirs for my family. Didn't get to see wind mills like I wanted to, neither did I get to see any beautiful tulips coz it is still so bloody cold, all I got to see that was majorly different was people smoking weed (it is legal there!)! *Sigh*...
Spent my last night on the ship watching 'Casonova' which was a brilliant film, got all the privacy my boyfriend and I ever wanted coz we were just the two people going for that film. I felt as if I was being wooed by one of those millionaire's sons who had the ability to book the whole cinema just for the two of us (just like a scene from Korean dramas.. How romantic!)!!
Such a short trip isn't it but nonetheless very enjoyable. My honey buns even gave me a bonus by bringing me to 'The Deep' in Hull on the day we arrived in England. 'The Deep' is like the 'Underwater World' in Singapore where we go into this massive fish tank to view different types of fishes. A very very happy day few days for me and none of it could have been possible without my one and only around!!!
Enough talking, seeing is believing so here are some pictures taken over the special and lovely weekend I had!!
The Humber Bridge...
Side view of Humber Bridge.. I was bored during the car ride!!
I am short plus the bad photographer (Him!!), that's why I look like I have got toad eyes!
Cool Marc but fat face Karina!!!
Me in the middle of Amsterdam.
That's the taxi in Holland, so cosy isn't it?
Grand and magnificient lifts in a shopping centre.
'US' on the coach!!
Chilling.
Smoky Marc, others are social smokers, we are holiday smokers!!!
Team MARINA!!!
Casonova and I...
lovey dovey.. muax
Sting Ray.. would make a delicious meal.. yummy!!
Shark.. run now!!!
Great photography skills of mine!!
Just take him!! Please...